Terms of Use
Solavista Media
Terms of Use
Welcome to Solavista Media and our website terms of use. (Updated January 2010.)
But honestly, we can’t believe you actually clicked to read this. Sad really. You must have some time to kill.
Well, apparently, these pages are actually important. Our lawyers made us include it and made us add a link on every page of the site to get you here. At first, we thought the lawyers were a real pain. But then we read the page. What an awakening! It’s really important stuff. We took the legalese the lawyers wrote and translated it into readable English.
So be a smart nethead and read the stuff on this page. It could prevent you from hearing from our lawyer, or worse yet, from some really nasty people, like prosecutors.
Here’s the deal: Terms of Use
First off, we own the trademark for the name ‘Solavista Media.’ Yes it’s true. So we can use it all that we want, in nearly any way that we choose. Don’t believe us? Check for yourself.
Second, we run this site so that people like you (and people you like) can use it for personal entertainment, information, education, communication, and cyberfication. So go ahead and browse around all you like. You can even download and/or buy stuff from the site but only for non-commercial, personal use. If you do, though, don’t fool around with the aforementioned trademark or copyright and other notices all over the stuff. They’re there for a really good reason. And don’t even think about distributing, modifying, transmitting, reusing, re-posting, or doing anything else uncool with any of the stuff, including, text, images, audio, and video, for public or commercial purposes unless we give you written permission.
And it’s not likely we will.
Why not? Read on.
If you visit our site, you’re legally obligated to [read: stuck with] the terms and conditions listed below and any other law or regulation that applies to the site, the Internet, and the World Wide Web, or Yokel City, USA. You shouldn’t have access or browse the site if you have any problem with that, because once you start, there’s no turning back — you are bound by [read:stuck with] the terms and conditions.
So here’s the scoop on our Top Ten Rules for Cybersurfers who hang out on our site:
1. For everyone’s sake, just assume that everything on the site is copyrighted unless we say it’s not. So you can’t use the stuff except how we say you can on this page or anywhere else on the site without our written permission. And like we said before, it’s not likely we’ll give you permission anyway. In fact, even if we wanted to, the lawyers are kinda jerks about that stuff and are likely to veto any deal anyway. So it’s better you don’t even ask.
2. While we try to include accurate stuff on the site, we’re not promising you it’s accurate. In fact, we’re not promising you anything except fun, some good information, products, services and maybe even some entertainment. So if you use or purchase stuff on the site, you’re using or owning it at your own risk. Don’t call us if there’s a problem because we assume no liability or responsibility for errors or omissions on the site.
3. We and anybody else who helped us create, produce, or deliver the site are not liable for any damages you suffer when you use it. In particular, the lawyers want you to know that our disclaimer includes “direct, incidental, consequential, indirect, or punitive damages arising out of your access to, or use of, or purchasess from the site. Without limiting the foregoing, everything on the site is provided to you ” ‘AS IS’ WITHOUT WARRANTY OF ANY KIND, EITHER EXPRESSED OR IMPLIED, INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO, THE IMPLIED WARRANTIES OF MERCHANT ABILITY, FITNESS, FOR A PARTICULAR PURPOSE, OR NON-INFRINGEMENT. Please note that some jurisdictions may not allow the exclusion of implied warranties, so some of the above exclusions may not apply to you. Check your local law for any restrictions or limitations regarding the exclusion of implied warranties.”
Ugh!
What a mouthful from the mouthpieces. We put all of that in quotes because we couldn’t figure out any other way to say it that the lawyers would accept. But here’s the bottom line — we’re not responsible if you’re browsing around and the site damages you or your computer or infects it with any nasty viruses.
We sure hope that doesn’t happen, but if it does, don’t call us.
4. If you don’t want the world to know something, don’t provide it to us on the site in any bulletin board or anyplace else we give you the chance. That’s because anything you disclose to us is ours. That’s right — ours. So we can do anything we want with the stuff you give us. We can reproduce it, disclose it, transmit it, publish it, broadcast it, and post it someplace else. We can even send it to your mother (as soon as we find her address). Not only that, we can even use any ideas, concepts, know-hows, or techniques, you post any way we want to, including developing, manufacturing, and marketing products or other stuff using the information you post.
5. Pictures of people or places shown on the site are either our property or we’re using with their permission. No matter what, it’s definitely not your property. You or any of your net-friends can’t use it unless we said you can on this page or somewhere else on the site. But guess what — we won’t say yes. So be careful, jerky, because unauthorized use may violate all sorts of nasty laws. So smarten up, keep the stuff you download to yourself.
6. There’s also a lot of trademarks, logos, and service marks on the site, including the name Solavista Media.com, Solavista Media, LLC, Solavista Media Logo, the Solavista Media exclamation point, “How The World Sees Your Design”, that either we own or we’re using with some one else’s permission. So don’t think you have any kind of license or right to use them, because you don’t and we’re not about to give you one. If you don’t leave them alone and mess with the trademarks, logos, and service marks on our site, we’ll probably go ballistic — so will the companies that own the other trademarks, logos, and service marks. That means we are likely to sue you or to ask a prosecutor to come after you for messing around with our property or the property of others.
7. You’ll probably notice we’ve linked our site to some others. We’re certain to link to some more. While that’s cool, it doesn’t mean we’ve looked at every single, solitary page on each and EVERY one of those sites, much less checked them out periodically to see what’s going on. So don’t blame us if some site you link to is bad or has stuff on it that offends you or your pets. Go ahead and link, but remember you’re doing it at your risk.
8. We’re allowed to change this page or anything else on the site any time we want to. That’s because it’s ours and we have the programmers with the mad skills who can do it. If we do change the page, then you’re bound by [read:stuck with] those changes, too, whenever you visit our site.
9. If this all sounds kind of mean and undiplomatic, you should have seen what the lawyers gave us in the first place. Holy $%@*! We had to remind them that human torture and sacrifice was outlawed in the United States a long, long time ago.
Boy, did they look disappointed.
10. Contact us with any technical inquiries or comments about SOLAVISTA.COM or Solavista Media, LLC or in writing to:
Solavista Media, LLC
14362 North Frank Lloyd Wright Blvd.
Suite 1000
Scottsdale, Arizona 85260
United States